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Excuse Me, Are You Visiting or Have You Moved In? The Freeloader Nightmare
Townships or squatter communities known as “Hooverville’s” during President Hoover’s term as President (or back in the day as my son might say) began to spring up all over the United States due to the fallout from the Great Depression. These ragtag “communities” were made up of people who had been evicted from their homes or farms. These people, who were labeled vagabonds, were forced to live a degrading existence among the grotesque piles of accumulated garbage, made up of the public waste thrown away from the food they had to eat or from various valuable articles that they could sell. The poor and the poor would cook meager portions of food in tin cans over open fires, covering themselves with old newspapers while wearing Hoover shoes with holes in their soles. The only landscape was clouded with dust in the summer and mud in the winter while breathing the stench from all the garbage and the very unsanitary landfills. These poor Depression-era hobos, however, are no comparison to today’s modern freeloaders, lazy, selfish people who are calculating in their tactics, and who in no way suffered as much as the displaced victims of the Great Depression.
Yes we are suffering, and in fact times have changed, but eating banana peels and newspaper is not the same as eating your whole family or friends potato chips while watching a re-run of Friends on cable TV. . With today’s economic crisis, many people have had to depend on family, friends and relatives to help them until they get on their financial back. However, the thing is, too many find this life of “luxury” very accommodating, and so they stay as permanent guests taking advantage of the hospitality of a loved one. This is not a new incident, it just happens more often today thanks to our wonderful economy falling apart, but I, for one, think free-loading is wrong, and it must stop. There is a difference between visiting a loved one and ordering from their home.
Here is an example. Several years ago, my husband and I moved to Florida. Every year we would go back to New Jersey to visit family and friends. Well, my husband will always invite everyone to come down to Florida to stay at our house, so they don’t have to spend on a hotel, forgetting that we were only renting a small 2 bedroom apartment. Of course, everyone jumped at the opportunity, including his drinking buddies, who came in a car loaded with bags and drinks. I was working the graveyard shift at the post office and needed to sleep during the day. Well, once, it seems that our room was offered to his friend to drink with his friend’s wife, while I had to meet in the room of my two children. These moochers came empty handed and ate like there was no tomorrow. A week turned into two weeks, which seemed as if it would extend for more. I told my husband to kick them out which he refused to do saying that they were his guests, and that would be rude on his part. I was angry, working nights, and not sleeping well. During the day, they went down to the beach or explored the area, having a grand old time. The woman did nothing to help me. I couldn’t take it anymore. I called the hotels in the area and asked what the prices were, and when the couple returned in the afternoon, I told them that they had to leave, it had been two weeks already, and I needed my room back The man said he paid my husband $20.00 a week for the room, which was ridiculous… Imagine thinking that $20.00 a week would cover the cost of 3 square meals a day plus my room for two. No way Jose, he had to get out of his head. Well, I must say that after they saw how angry I was, they received the message out loud and immediately called a nephew who lived in the area. It annoyed me again, knowing that they had a nephew who lived nearby, and I had to be inconvenienced by this couple of moochers. So instead of going to a hotel where they had to pay, they ended up at their nephew’s house. Good riddance, finally, but that still did not stop the flow of guests coming and going and free-loading off of us. This created a lot of hostility between my husband and me. Finally, after 7 years of acting like a drunken bed and breakfast, we moved back to New Jersey. This prevented family and friends from visiting them.
The thing is, all the moochers and freeloaders acted in the same rude, selfish way. No one understood why I would become irritated, work, sacrifice living space, cook, do all the shopping and was imposed on for too long. I’m supposed to have a moocher guide out there that they all swear by.
The Moocher’s Guide:
Law Number 1: Find a trusted friend or relative and arrange a “short” but indefinite visit.
Law Number 2: Convince these brands to become your personal ATM.
Law Number 3: Always manipulate others into not paying your fair share, hard drinking friends with the check, bum rides, sponge cigarettes, food, etc.
Law Number 4: Never, under any circumstances, clean up after yourself. This sets a dangerous precedent.
Law Number 5: Always attack any refrigerator alone. Leave nothing.
Law Number 6: Never be polite. Assume it is yours by natural law, consume and destroy.
Law Number 7: Have fun while brands work. What are vacations for?
Law Number 8: Make yourself scarce when it’s time to work.
Frankly, freeloaders are a threat to society. People who have problems freeloader reason become depressed and angry. To make matters worse, moochers often don’t bathe, flush the toilet or wipe the seat when finished or wash their own clothes. What moochers actually do is use the phone all night, letting it off the hook when they’re done. They leave the TV on all night and are loud while you try to sleep to avoid them. If subtle hints and veiled innuendos won’t work, then throw out all the belongings and change the locks. The following is my own handbook, listing the problems with moochers and how to deal with them.
PROBLEM: A friend or loved one shows up uninvited, looking for sympathy and a place to stay.
SOLUTION: If someone shows up uninvited, you can tell the person in a polite way that you just left and don’t have time to talk. The strongest weapon that a freeloader has is using guilt to get what they want from you. Prepare for it. Don’t feel guilty. Always mean people who like to tag along but always seem to forget to bring their wallets. Always mention before you go anywhere that involves a price, that if the other person has his wallet with them. Or you can simply say it’s better that you go Dutch. Then if the person says he doesn’t have any money, you tell them, ‘I’m sorry I don’t have enough, pay for you too so we’ll have to skip it.’
PROBLEM: A friend or loved one still wants to visit you but does not invite you to visit them. Always try to exchange home visits.
SOLUTION: If someone was at your house this week watching the game and eating all your stuff and drinking your beer, then you recommend making him at his house the next week. If they don’t cooperate, don’t bother with them. If they take advantage of you, start monitoring your dealings with them or stop it altogether. You want to tell them that you are not a money tree, nor are you a restaurant, hotel or maid service. You have to nip this behavior in the bud, because the longer you wait, the more tense you will become, and the harder it will be to get rid of these people. Then it becomes the squatter’s right. They have every right and you get squat.
PROBLEM: Your family wants to stay with you until they ‘get back on their feet’. If they live with you, you must give them some time to get out of your house.
SOLUTION: One way to prevent moochers from staying in your home is to keep the refrigerator or cabinets as empty as possible. Hide your supplies somewhere; give them a list of homework to do. If they complain, tell them to buy their own food or they can leave.
PROBLEM: You feel like a maid with all the mess left behind and you are sick of things like your guests leaving dirty linens, wet towels on the bed or the bathroom counter.
SOLUTION: House-guests should clean up after themselves. If they are there for a week or so, then they should offer to take the host out to dinner for their trouble. If they plan to return, then tell them that you already have plans for this time and that no one will be home. Try to make your excuse seem sincere and convincing as best you can.
PROBLEM: Families will come to your home and stay as long as they want, so they can save on hotel costs. So, the longer they stay, the more resentment will build up, which will eventually damage family relationships.
SOLUTION: Families do not have the right to be barred because they are family, they must call or write first. If they arrive unexpectedly, take them to a hotel or give them a ride on the nearest transport. Don’t let moochers have the run of the house; they need to help in cooking, do their own laundry and send in some cash. They do not have the right to take advantage of you to save on expenses because somewhere in the family tree, you inherited some of their blood or your spouse did.
PROBLEM: Guests who won’t leave when it’s getting late.
SOLUTION: If you feel your eyelids are starting to get heavy or like you have a severe case of hives, start yawning, scratching and get up slowly and politely; mention that you had a nice evening, that you must repeat the visit at ANOTHER better time. If you continue to stand, they will get up, at least you hope so, then start walking to the door. If they don’t take the hint, then come right out and tell them that you have to go to work tomorrow and that you are tired and want to go to bed. My mother swears by brooms. He said when you wanted the company that was on-stay welcome to leave turn the broom upside down by the door, and you will see that it works. Yeah, right mom, like in your dream, it won’t happen.
PROBLEM: The friend or family member who always owes you money and never pays it back or considers you their unpaid personal taxi service.
SOLUTION: Just say you don’t mind taking them where they’re going, but you don’t have gas in your car or money to pay for gas to get there and NEVER lend money to anyone who has forced you twice.
Follow these simple tips and you will soon be free of freeloaders. Good luck!
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